Day Sixteen

I can't believe I did it again. Posting late. Well, thank Kami I figured out how to reset the date and time settings on this thing. So, while I am posting this past midnight again it should show up as Sunday and not Monday.

Pretty bland day today. I should have been writing my story update, but I still don't feel up to it. Mostly I've just been counting the days and trying to stay positive. It's hard though, even with 43 days left. Maybe it's because I'm dying to stand on the scale. I'm not sure. Or maybe it's because I really wanna nibble on a cheeseburger and i know I can't. But I think that's more because I haven't had one in over two weeks. Actually, probably longer... since we don't eat out often.

I don't even care that I'm rambling.

Part of me wants to keep stopping. Everyday I look at the countdown clock I have set up, and think to myself, am I going to make it? Or, do I really have that many days left? And, January 23rd is such a long time from now. But then I remind myself why I'm doing it once more. And then I say to myself, why couldn't you have just gone thirty days, you idiot? Then no one would think you were quitting!

These are my thoughts.

I feel like I'm going up and down. One day I'm stoked and tell myself I can do it. And other days I second guess myself and really want a steak. But then I look at the calendar and remind myself that it's really not that long of a time. It just feels like it because I'm making it feel that way. I mean, 43 days isn't that bad right?

It's been a hard day folks. Thanks for reading.